When I'm sad y'all come running back to me asking me whether I'm alright, truthfully I don't know if it comes from the bottom of your heart, whether you're concerned or just trying to join in the crowd. Trying to tell me that I'm such a pathetic girl, crying everyday, someone who can't figure out what she wants. Actually I think I expect too much, I want and need everything to be done near to perfect. Whatever it is, if it falls below my expectations, I'll cry immediately. Try me.

Today I got back my chemistry test... I scored fine but inside me I'm actually crying. It isn't what I expected, I could have done better but no matter how much times I repeat this, the outcome is still the same.

Do you know why I cry? Because I care so much about y'all. I can't afford to lose anything, including my best friends and you-know-who-you-are. Don't show me your hypocritical concern only when people mentioned what happened to me, I've got enough of it, seriously....... Just do all you want. I hate being with you, you never fail to make me feel unimportant. And when y'all say I can text you all whenever I'm upset and all, but when it comes to that which happened, I can't bring myself to tell anyone. I'd rather cry, cuddle under my blanket and cry. Waiting for someone who will actually made an effort to pad me on the shoulders and tell me he/she will make those people who make me cry vanish, yes I mean vanish. I want to be sure of everything again. I want to wake up in the morning with people. I don't want to live with doubt. I want everything to make sense. I want to close my eyes and make a decision and that's that. I want to be happy... I want to be happy again.